Maintain Consciousness

How has the time escaped me? How has it been a year since celebrating a beautiful couple devoting themselves to each other for life. Congratulations Laurynn and James on your 1st Anniversary of Holy Matrimony!! :)

But here's an update, School's out for the summer. It ended on Wednesday and my goodness, I'm certain the children would have been out for blood if it was any longer. HAHA, but I kid you not, all the students were loco crazy, unable to focus. I found myself in wonder about it not being so long ago that it was I in their shoes, itching to be outside, wiggling in my chair counting down the minutes for that final bell to signal the sweet sweet freedom of summer vacation.

I have gotten asked what I will be doing this summer now that school is out and here's the deal. I am still working with clients as we transition into a summer program that continues to offer support and therapeutic activities over the summer days to build continuity into their lives. I move into a 4 - 10hr day schedule freeing up my weekends for ample fishing, hiking and iced coffee drinking!

If you are friends of mine on Facebook, you have probably seen my constant updates of a fire in the area and honestly, folks, it's a little scary. What started out last week as a campfire that wasn't put out all the way has now consumed over 100,000 acres and is still raging. With the dry conditions and high winds, it hasn't been getting better. Thankfully most of the burn has occurred in the Wildlife Refuge and the new vegetation that will result will promote moose populations. However, evacuations have been issued and people are at risk of losing their homes and possessions. If you are the praying kind, please be praying for safety for the fire fighters, helo and air supports as well as the families. Pray also for rain. The whole state needs it, but the aid it would bring to smoldering out this fire as it's only 20% contained. If you want to keep updated and informed, Google: Funny River Fire.

I will be posting again shortly. But for now, my room needs some serious TLC.

Much Love,
Rachel

Warriors with Childlike Tenaciousness

As I have said before, my job is quite taxing. Mentally. Emotionally. Sometimes even physically. This week was no exception. Monday was the Monday of Mondays and the rest of the week always seemed like it should have be Friday. The week wasn't difficult with clients, but more with conflict with staff and the stress of getting prepared for Summer Program. Earlier in the week I emailed Becky a subject line reading: SELF CARE and the body of the message: Paint Fight.

Words can't really describe what occurred in the events leading up to but basically we were in clothes waiting to be trashed, a leaky super soaker with watered down paint, a paper plate full of paint and the rest in a bag....driving around finding the perfect location - which of course was on the other side of a NO TRESPASSING sign.

From that point on - the pictures can speak for themselves.



Youthful Exuberance. Bliss. I haven't laughed this hard for weeks. It was very therapeutic and good for the soul. What happened next astonished me. Becky said, "hey! let's go to Fred's and conduct a social experiment." So off we went, still wet with our outrageous paint job and the reactions that ensued were shocking. Some disheartening. Others were encouraging, inspiring. They all held one thing in common: they were all REAL. We were passed by individuals whose gaze was locked straight ahead, not daring to challenge our eyes, not willing to match our smiles. One gentleman, said "WOAH! gave us a thumbs up." Multiple asked if we had just finished a color run. A few teenage girls gasped an OMG!! and later when a third party mutual friend joined them and called me out to say "hi" I of course took the opportunity to make a conversation out of it. One guy asked us to not paint his house. Children looked quizically and asked their parents for reasoning. I ran into school staff who praised us! (I can't wait for Monday afternoon). The best part was listening to Becky rally off "Bucket List: Check Mark!" while she swung her finger in the air and encouraged others to have their own.

Yes, we had a paint fight. Yes, for the hell of it. To laugh and for just because. There is far too much seriousness and rigidity in the world. As a single woman in her 20s on a Friday night, I want to be an example that fun can be had in very simple and innocent ways, ways that I would wager most people at one point in their life wanted to partake in but didn't because they couldn't step outside of conformity and comfort and pride. Was this silly? ABSOLUTELY. Was this childlike? 100%. Would I do it again? Becky and I are already planning a mudd fight before the ground dries up.

Much Love,
Rach

BreakUp

BreakUp Season to an Alaskan would be Spring in Layman's Terms to the rest of us "48ers". The rivers start flowing a little faster, and deeper. The snow melts, creating pot holes and mud puddles the size of my jeep!! The sun stays out later and later, daylight lasting upwards 14.5 hours. Temps rise around 45 degrees, slight breeze, but the real kicker is the absence of Alaska's State Bird: the Mosquito. I find myself stopping, turning, facing the sun and letting it warm my face, every opportunity that may come. Thankfully, that comes frequently as my office is set outside of the school :) I can't get over the smell though, this town stinks, not of manure on a farm either (one of Bozeman's finer qualities) but of poop. Dog poop. BLICK! Have I written about this before? FUDGE. clearly, I need some ideas about what to write about.

Much Love,
Rachel

Proclamation

I will take advantage of every sunny day after I get off work to soak up that Vit D and enjoy warmish sunny weather before the Mosquitoes suck out all the potential for enjoying such weather.

sincerely,
Rachel K. Rehbein




P.S. Much Love!!

Backpacking in the Backcountry

"Rachel, you seem like you are an outdoor kind of girl." - Laura remarked.

"well, I am but I just didn't have many opportunities to do this kind of stuff

I came to realize how much my heart doesn't match my head for a lot of things in life. A prime example would be the backpacking trip I took over the weekend. There was a Facebook chat open with us 4 adventurers, talking about who is bringing what and they (notice I didn't say "we") were listing things off: "I've got dinner" "breakfast and cooking equipment" "I'm bringing cookies and cards and TP" I said, "I'm so glad you all have it figured out" at this point I wasn't sure what I had gotten myself into. Hiking, with a backpack on a bad foot?

oh yea, my foot. Let's back up to the beginning of the week. I went running Sunday and Monday with the hopes of getting semi in shape for the Beat Beethoven 5k in a few weeks in Fairbanks but during which I somehow did something to injure myself (and everyone shakes their head in pitiful sorrow and shame for my incredible ability to inflict accidental self harm.) Anyways, the pain in quite intense that walking has been made difficult for a week now. Yes, I went to the Dr. and what a waste of time and money!! No suggestions of care except - "don't run. and when you do run, take it easy." My flippant response, "No Shhhhht Sherlock."

Now let's flash forward to Friday, at work hobbling around, slightly stressing because, during my lunch break I go to the store for "lunch" but also to pick up sunglasses,water bottle, and protein bars. I get off the clock at 3:30, have a 10 minute drive home which along the way, I have to make a stop at the bestie's house to get her gear so that I have gear to go on this trip. I get packed and start thinking, "hmmmm, am I going to be warm enough? what exactly should I be taking? I feel like I wont be sharing the load with the others as I'm not bringing anything to share for the good of the group." Laura comes. She, Steph and I pile in my recently "cleaned" car. ahem* yes, so we pick up Val and are on our way. An hour later and we are at the parking lot strapping up and getting ready to go.

*snap* group selfie!! :) in order L to R: This writer, Laura, Steph and Val

And we were off, 4 miles to go! I used Nike+ on my phone to track our progress and instantly we were accompanied by Faure Op. 16. (I disagree that this piece is appropriate for running to, however, a lovely walk in the woods added to the ambiance.)

The trail was flat and hidden with snow and ice, so the ice cleats came in handy, especially when they were worn correctly. We came to a split in the Trail: summer or winter. Let's go winter! Straight through a swamp, marshland the perfect dwelling for Moose. The end of the trail was a lake. Frozen aside from where the river was running into it. The debate started, do we turn back or cross? On we went, crossing the lake with a "wabump" sound in the distance. It was a little eerie but it was the ice forming and shifting. Laura booked it across, leaving us behind. We shouted for her to have the fire going and dinner ready but that went unheard.

We made it to Barber cabin, 4 miles in 2 hours. Time to unload, eat and get warm. We were in bed by 10pm trying to get warm. I fell asleep first. Predictable. Breakfast soon came as did the realization of how sore we would all be for the rest of the weekend. We said farewell to the cozy cabin and started the hike out which we encountered the remains of an avalanche covering the trail.

At last we found ourselves back at the Jeep and all too excited to be sitting for the next hour on the drive back home.

Sightings:
Bears: None
Moose: None
Other Wildlife: None
People: Enough

The next trip sounds like it could be a sea kayak trip across the cove in Homer, AK. :)

So why doesn't my head match my heart? Because, my heart loves and longs for the outdoors and these adventures but my head has no knowledge of how to pack, or what gear is needed. I only own cotton, and tennis shoes.

But anyways, This chick is signing off to take a snooze before the work week begins again.
Much Love,
Rachel

Cravings

And not of the food variety; but for life. For experience.

I found myself in a bookstore today in downtown Bozeman scanning the shelves for anything, nothing in particular. Only a few things stood out amongst the masses. I'm a self declared book whore which I take to mean I collect them, regardless of age, binding, cover, if their pages hold a story in type or if they lay in wait for nonsensical thoughts to be penned down, I want it.  This entry too got its beginning as chicken scratch in a blank note book comprised of compressed trees.

I at any given time have a stack of books long awaiting their time to be turned over, exposing their own brilliance and beauty in the magnitude of secrecy, truth and adventure they hold.

So why don't I read more??

Because I crave experiences not just of reading but writing and creating something with paint or yarn, of exploring the wild through hiking and fishing. And I crave human interaction. Spending time with others, sharing laughter and tears and fits of rage through stories and rants and questions.

And finding a balance for all of this is a massive struggle which I'm searching for ways to enjoy and partake in each without overly neglecting the next.

Your suggestions are most welcome.
Much Love,
Rach

Analogies try 2 (the first wouldn't post)

I know I have mentioned in previous posts about flow. I was struck by it again last week but it wasn't my typical creative artistic flow and desire to pick up my brushes to lay out a outdoor scene. It came in two forms: first was through drawing, abstract (for me anyways) using color as a means to further extract meaning and depth of understanding that the paper was saturated with. Has your coocoo alarm sounded yet? Mine did, but I guess each has the responsibility to credit or dismiss such inspiration on their own accord. I read into it enough to gain truths about myself that were somewhat known to me and familiar, just seeing them illustrated was a little bizarre.

The second was during an early morning routine at work where I casually grab a Rubik cube and manipulate it, twisting and turning it trying to put it right again. This perplexing moment, a bitterly sour question arose in my stomach: can a Rubik's cube ever be made whole again? This question and this Rubik cube went deeper than just a child's toy, for me it began to appear as a reflection of the lives of those I work with, children, who many have been exposed to neglect and abuse.  I probed my coworker and this was our conversation:

Can a Rubik cube ever be made whole again?

B - I don't think so....a Rubik's cube is a metaphor for life... if you manhandle it enough to the point it breaks.... it will never be whole again.

And while it isn't broken, it still twists and turns and morphs and changes with the influence of those around it - but isn't whole or perfect.

B - exactly. Some people are able to get to the Rubik's secrets with ease, while others struggle... unable to ever figure it out... at times people treat the cube with such frustration that they vow never to try and solve it's problem while others swear not to until they finish the task.

I understand that some of my friends and family and other readers many think I'm delusional or in the wrong line of work for being a firm believer in Biblical truth yet being fully submerged into a world of psychology. Yes, I get it. Those two worlds don't mesh, they repel the other. But this is my position. According to Luke 5, Jesus states: “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance.”

Yes, I'm not outwardly allowed to proclaim Christ, unless initiated by a client. Yes, if given the opportunity to (which has occurred) I will take it. Yes, I will gladly risk being written up and fired for proclaiming my faith in Christ. And finally, yes, I do believe that my clients are able to see the love of Christ in me and through me. There is a quote that says: people will forget the words you have said, but they will never forget they way you made them feel.

These kids need love and consistency and healthy/appropriate boundaries. And if I can find abstract ways to teach and show them these things while prayerfully offering my time and interactions with these kiddos to the Lord - then you better believe I will bust my butt for these kids.

Much Love,
Rachel